people are drawn deeper into tragedy not by their defects but by their virtues. that is the premise of a tragic hero, or at least it was in shakespearean times. that noble concept as since eroded. from the crevices of prototypical tragic hero a la Oedipus, noble but flawed because of his virtue and innocence, crept out the anti-hero.
the anti-hero is consciously a villian in action but a hero at heart. that is the appeal isn't it? that behind every flawed action there is a shining light of redemption because it is motivated by pureness (though at times reluctently so). take Frank Castle, aka the Punisher. it is because he is driven by the loss of his family that we can rationalize his otherwise inhumane actions in his quest for revenge. we can say to ourselves "what he is doing is wrong, but i understand why he is doing it." one might even go so far as to empathize with him.
the anti-hero brings to light the concept of grey in what was previously a black and white world, which is comforting.
after all, doesn't everyone want shades of redemption?
2006-01-28
following the erosion of tragic heros (et tu, brute?) to anti heros (Marv from Sin City, Batman) the next logical step would not only be someone with no redeemable qualities or tragic flaw, save for the fact that the tragic flaw is his very existence. but no, because he is the lineage of tragic heros, one cannot condemn him. And that is Vincent, the assassin in Collateral.
He is not amoral. neither is he confused. he is just very logical. after his first hit, a confused and scared max, the cab driver, sputters on, questioning how he could kill the man.
Vincent: Max, six billion people on the planet, you're getting bent out of shape cause of one fat guy.
Max: Well, who was he?
Vincent: What do you care? Have you ever heard of Rwanda?
Max: Yes, I know Rwanda.
Vincent: Well, tens of thousands killed before sundown. Nobody's killed people that fast since Nagasaki and Hiroshima. Did you bat an eye, Max?
Max: What?
Vincent: Did you join Amnesty International, Oxfam, Save the Whales, Greenpeace, or something? No. I off one fat Angelino and you throw a hissy fit.
Max: Man, I don't know any Rwandans.
Vincent: You don't know the guy in the trunk, either.
with reasons as plain as that, i might be so inclined to off someone myself. what vincent lacks isn't a heart. he did save max's life in the nightclub scene. what vincent does is partition - cruelly, cold-heartedly.
billed as a thriller, the movie is actually more of what happens in between. the action scenes could be sliced right out and the movie would still shine. max's growing confidence and vincent who somehow somehow you think theres something about him and you don't want to write him off as a villian.
ironic how vincent dies in a subway. in the beginning of the movie, he says to max :
Max: First time in L.A.?
Vincent: No. Tell you the truth, whenever I'm here I can't wait to leave. It's too sprawled out, disconnected. You know? That's me. You like it?
Max: It's my home.
Vincent: 17 million people. This is got to be the fifth biggest economy in the world and nobody knows each other. I read about this guy who gets on the MTA here, dies.
Max: Oh.
Vincent: Six hours he's riding the subway before anybody notices his corpse doing laps around L.A., people on and off sitting next to him. Nobody notices.
so is vincent the by-product of urban living? alienated, disconnected. is he emotionally flaccid, or just guarded? whatever it is, vincent is a caricature of who we all could be.
call it the perks of being alive.
He is not amoral. neither is he confused. he is just very logical. after his first hit, a confused and scared max, the cab driver, sputters on, questioning how he could kill the man.
Vincent: Max, six billion people on the planet, you're getting bent out of shape cause of one fat guy.
Max: Well, who was he?
Vincent: What do you care? Have you ever heard of Rwanda?
Max: Yes, I know Rwanda.
Vincent: Well, tens of thousands killed before sundown. Nobody's killed people that fast since Nagasaki and Hiroshima. Did you bat an eye, Max?
Max: What?
Vincent: Did you join Amnesty International, Oxfam, Save the Whales, Greenpeace, or something? No. I off one fat Angelino and you throw a hissy fit.
Max: Man, I don't know any Rwandans.
Vincent: You don't know the guy in the trunk, either.
with reasons as plain as that, i might be so inclined to off someone myself. what vincent lacks isn't a heart. he did save max's life in the nightclub scene. what vincent does is partition - cruelly, cold-heartedly.
billed as a thriller, the movie is actually more of what happens in between. the action scenes could be sliced right out and the movie would still shine. max's growing confidence and vincent who somehow somehow you think theres something about him and you don't want to write him off as a villian.
ironic how vincent dies in a subway. in the beginning of the movie, he says to max :
Max: First time in L.A.?
Vincent: No. Tell you the truth, whenever I'm here I can't wait to leave. It's too sprawled out, disconnected. You know? That's me. You like it?
Max: It's my home.
Vincent: 17 million people. This is got to be the fifth biggest economy in the world and nobody knows each other. I read about this guy who gets on the MTA here, dies.
Max: Oh.
Vincent: Six hours he's riding the subway before anybody notices his corpse doing laps around L.A., people on and off sitting next to him. Nobody notices.
so is vincent the by-product of urban living? alienated, disconnected. is he emotionally flaccid, or just guarded? whatever it is, vincent is a caricature of who we all could be.
call it the perks of being alive.
i had one of those lucid dreams last night.
so i went home from zouk and went to sleep, but in my dream i dreamt the rest of the guys came over after zouk and we hung out a bit and then we went out to eat pizza. its one of those dreams that when you wake up, you have to take a moment to ponder - did i dream it or did it happen? especially since it fitted so seamlessly with my night.
-
i vaguely recall a super criterion collection box set on sale last year. does anyone remember this at all? i've been scouring the net to no avail.
so i went home from zouk and went to sleep, but in my dream i dreamt the rest of the guys came over after zouk and we hung out a bit and then we went out to eat pizza. its one of those dreams that when you wake up, you have to take a moment to ponder - did i dream it or did it happen? especially since it fitted so seamlessly with my night.
-
i vaguely recall a super criterion collection box set on sale last year. does anyone remember this at all? i've been scouring the net to no avail.
sunshine through my window,
a smile on my face.
-
i have broken the curse. after a straight hitter of 4-times-in-a-row-drunk at zouk, i return tonight, triumphant and sober, though S$28 poorer. its like when i was always getting drunk in JC till one day i told myself i had to stop and i kept wearing the same pair of red underwear (auspicious!), thinking it would help, (that pair is now lost) till finally, many parties later, i stopped drinking myself silly. i hope its not a recurring theme though.
-
good fucking night.
a smile on my face.
-
i have broken the curse. after a straight hitter of 4-times-in-a-row-drunk at zouk, i return tonight, triumphant and sober, though S$28 poorer. its like when i was always getting drunk in JC till one day i told myself i had to stop and i kept wearing the same pair of red underwear (auspicious!), thinking it would help, (that pair is now lost) till finally, many parties later, i stopped drinking myself silly. i hope its not a recurring theme though.
-
good fucking night.
2006-01-23
"look at them! they're so red and angry!" tsked the doctor when he scoped my nasal passages and throat. and that they did. very red and throbby.
i could see the insides of my nose and throat on a screen. i didn't recognise myself on screen but it seems i have a deviated nasal passage or something like that. he then took out a contraption and stuck it up my nose and schlllloooopppp sucked all my excess mucus out. a mini vacuum! i suddenly could breathe so freely. its like how you feel after just shaving your head. you can feel the air on your scalp.
of the many pills (sans thrills) he prescribed me, one has an advisory that says "causes insomnia". another says "causes drowsiness". so when their powers combine, i think i'll be perfectly fine.
-
she took an uninspired bite out of her sandwich.
he stretched and languidly got up
she walked down the hall. her heels clicked like a metronome.
i could see the insides of my nose and throat on a screen. i didn't recognise myself on screen but it seems i have a deviated nasal passage or something like that. he then took out a contraption and stuck it up my nose and schlllloooopppp sucked all my excess mucus out. a mini vacuum! i suddenly could breathe so freely. its like how you feel after just shaving your head. you can feel the air on your scalp.
of the many pills (sans thrills) he prescribed me, one has an advisory that says "causes insomnia". another says "causes drowsiness". so when their powers combine, i think i'll be perfectly fine.
-
she took an uninspired bite out of her sandwich.
he stretched and languidly got up
she walked down the hall. her heels clicked like a metronome.
2006-01-22
poptartttt was fun fun fun for everyone. (you should go) i lived out my big pimp fantasy of drinking moet outta a bottle at the expense of my bank account balance but in the end i say wtf it was fun (whos your daddy?!). for once i dont wake up the next morning feeling like shit and all.
the sun is up and i am feeling much better. i think i may be a plant. i keep saying that, and i also keep saying "have you read philip k dick? because theres one story where they colonise this planet but for some strange reason, everyone there just becomes a plant."
i think we should all be able to photosynthesize. how cool would that be?
i am so looking forward to bangkok. i think it will be so mutherfucking kickass. like poptart, only 1000x more. and S$2 t-shirts! yes, my wardobe is getting a steroid boost.
anyway its noon now. the sun is blasting, so im going out to lie by the pool with shades and a book and a cold drink (with the obligatory hipster look of ho-hum-whats-new).
welcome to my post-NS decandant lifestyle of waste, excess and luxury.
the sun is up and i am feeling much better. i think i may be a plant. i keep saying that, and i also keep saying "have you read philip k dick? because theres one story where they colonise this planet but for some strange reason, everyone there just becomes a plant."
i think we should all be able to photosynthesize. how cool would that be?
i am so looking forward to bangkok. i think it will be so mutherfucking kickass. like poptart, only 1000x more. and S$2 t-shirts! yes, my wardobe is getting a steroid boost.
anyway its noon now. the sun is blasting, so im going out to lie by the pool with shades and a book and a cold drink (with the obligatory hipster look of ho-hum-whats-new).
welcome to my post-NS decandant lifestyle of waste, excess and luxury.
2006-01-16
friday night was rock bottom. and so i have 'nowhere to go but up', which is also a movie starring audrey tatou and justin therox. it's alternative title is 'happy ending', which is predictable enough given it stars audrey tatou. she also stars in 'the da vinci code' so i wonder hmm how will that turn out. happy ending/nowhere to go but up was also set in new york. i recognised soho, i recognised st. marks and i recognised (i think) chelsea.
i think what appeals so much about new york is how you can be a bit odd there. you're expected to be a kook or slightly dysfunctional, or at the very least yourself. abnormal is the normal there, or so my airy-fairy head tells me. even the air there smells different. (i was told its the garbage). don't tell me otherwise. i like my castles in the sky.
do you think leather stretches? technically it is skin and i've seen some skinny kids grow to become mother-fat-asses so i assume leater aka dried skin can do the same.
bob sinclar's love generation is uplifting. rita, 10/10 on that call. he was at zouk on friday spinning. i was too drunk to remember but i hope i danced to that song. i think i would've been pretty stoked when the whistling part came on.
of late i've been a big quitter. i quit smoking. i quit NS. and today i quit my job, after only working through my first morning. i was getting paid proofreading when all i wanted to do was wait on tables in a cafe or bar because its such a romantic notion. if i were an aspiring actor or struggling writer i'd be a living cliche. too bad i'm neither.
"less funk, more punk". remember that lennard. (thank you yoon)
today i was driving to jace's and i left my handphone on the car-roof when i drove off to send ding home and didn't remember about the phone until i got to the east. and i looked back at there it was in the little groove where the rear windshield ends and the boot starts. so i ran out of the car at a red light and grabbed my phone and scurried back to the car. "wow," i thought, feeling very lucky.
i think what appeals so much about new york is how you can be a bit odd there. you're expected to be a kook or slightly dysfunctional, or at the very least yourself. abnormal is the normal there, or so my airy-fairy head tells me. even the air there smells different. (i was told its the garbage). don't tell me otherwise. i like my castles in the sky.
do you think leather stretches? technically it is skin and i've seen some skinny kids grow to become mother-fat-asses so i assume leater aka dried skin can do the same.
bob sinclar's love generation is uplifting. rita, 10/10 on that call. he was at zouk on friday spinning. i was too drunk to remember but i hope i danced to that song. i think i would've been pretty stoked when the whistling part came on.
of late i've been a big quitter. i quit smoking. i quit NS. and today i quit my job, after only working through my first morning. i was getting paid proofreading when all i wanted to do was wait on tables in a cafe or bar because its such a romantic notion. if i were an aspiring actor or struggling writer i'd be a living cliche. too bad i'm neither.
"less funk, more punk". remember that lennard. (thank you yoon)
today i was driving to jace's and i left my handphone on the car-roof when i drove off to send ding home and didn't remember about the phone until i got to the east. and i looked back at there it was in the little groove where the rear windshield ends and the boot starts. so i ran out of the car at a red light and grabbed my phone and scurried back to the car. "wow," i thought, feeling very lucky.
2006-01-14
come into my big black heart.
i feel disconnected and discontented. i should be so happy because i just started clearing my NS leave. i should be happy. but i am sad and i don't know why so that makes me sad and confused which is sometimes depressing. the only comfort is the fact that it can all be explained with chemicals. dopamine. serotonin. its not my fault. who can argue with science.
i don't know whats wrong. can anyone help me.
i feel disconnected and discontented. i should be so happy because i just started clearing my NS leave. i should be happy. but i am sad and i don't know why so that makes me sad and confused which is sometimes depressing. the only comfort is the fact that it can all be explained with chemicals. dopamine. serotonin. its not my fault. who can argue with science.
i don't know whats wrong. can anyone help me.
2005-12-29
cool beans.
This year, there's a leap second. That means there will be 1 extra second this year as compared to last year, or next year. The last time this happened was in 1998.
-
History and Background Info
The "leap second" does not occur regularly, and is instead governed by the good sense of the International Earth Rotation and Reference Systems Service (IERS). Leap seconds are introduced to correct the difference between International Atomic Time and Solar Time.
IAC is defines 1 second as 9,192,631,770 cycles of the radiation which corresponds to the transition between two energy levels of the ground state of the caesium-133 atom. What that means, I am not too sure.
Solar Time is determined by the rotation of the Earth around its axis and its orbit around the Sun; time was measured by astronomical observations.
While the two are more or less in sync, Solar Time has a tendency to fluctuate due to the changing of tides and other factors. Thus, when this discrepency between the two exceed 0.9s, the IERS will magnamilously call for a Leap Second, which occurs either on the 30th of June or 31st of December.
-
Does this mean we, as a collective whole, gain time? Does this mean, as compared to my ancestors who lived centuries ago before this man-made introduction, I am, in absolute terms, getting more "bang for the buck" with my time on earth?
I am not familiar with einsteins theory of relativity so let me introduce lennard's theory of absolute relativity, which puts forth the idea that the extra second does, and does not, matter.
Let me explain. In relation to our ancestors, it matters. Because they did not have these extra seconds. In absolute terms, we have more time. But within our time now, the extra second means naught because we all get it. There is relative comparison. Its like everyone scored 2400 on their SATs, which would hence nullify its significance. (i.e. that people who score 2400 are very very smart.)
So how does my theory of absolute relativity work? It works when the importance of time is equal and its application different. Simple example- the shortening of NS, which was implemented (conveniently) after I enlisted. The batches after me gain 4 months of time over me. But, if I were to benefit from the NS reduction as well, then they have no gain on me and our time is on par in terms of importance.
Therefore mine is the concept of time as absolute, and how it is spent relative between myself and the rest of the world. It is a classic Singaporean mentality of how good is good, but better is always better.
And by better I mean better than other people.
This year, there's a leap second. That means there will be 1 extra second this year as compared to last year, or next year. The last time this happened was in 1998.
-
History and Background Info
The "leap second" does not occur regularly, and is instead governed by the good sense of the International Earth Rotation and Reference Systems Service (IERS). Leap seconds are introduced to correct the difference between International Atomic Time and Solar Time.
IAC is defines 1 second as 9,192,631,770 cycles of the radiation which corresponds to the transition between two energy levels of the ground state of the caesium-133 atom. What that means, I am not too sure.
Solar Time is determined by the rotation of the Earth around its axis and its orbit around the Sun; time was measured by astronomical observations.
While the two are more or less in sync, Solar Time has a tendency to fluctuate due to the changing of tides and other factors. Thus, when this discrepency between the two exceed 0.9s, the IERS will magnamilously call for a Leap Second, which occurs either on the 30th of June or 31st of December.
-
Does this mean we, as a collective whole, gain time? Does this mean, as compared to my ancestors who lived centuries ago before this man-made introduction, I am, in absolute terms, getting more "bang for the buck" with my time on earth?
I am not familiar with einsteins theory of relativity so let me introduce lennard's theory of absolute relativity, which puts forth the idea that the extra second does, and does not, matter.
Let me explain. In relation to our ancestors, it matters. Because they did not have these extra seconds. In absolute terms, we have more time. But within our time now, the extra second means naught because we all get it. There is relative comparison. Its like everyone scored 2400 on their SATs, which would hence nullify its significance. (i.e. that people who score 2400 are very very smart.)
So how does my theory of absolute relativity work? It works when the importance of time is equal and its application different. Simple example- the shortening of NS, which was implemented (conveniently) after I enlisted. The batches after me gain 4 months of time over me. But, if I were to benefit from the NS reduction as well, then they have no gain on me and our time is on par in terms of importance.
Therefore mine is the concept of time as absolute, and how it is spent relative between myself and the rest of the world. It is a classic Singaporean mentality of how good is good, but better is always better.
And by better I mean better than other people.
2005-12-25
2005-12-24
merry christmas.
my parents bought me Calvin Klein Truth EDT for xmas. so me being me, i went to read up on it online-
"TRUTH CALVIN KLEIN MEN is a new scent that is distinctive, aspirational and upscale. Truth Men is sexy and classic, inspired by masculinity in its purest form. The signature scent is drawn from nature and the warmth of skin. The structure of the fragrance is centred around a fresh core of canopy greens accented by basil and cardamom which radiate natural freshness throughout the fragrance."
and right enough, i don't quite like how it smells. then i remembered my friend uses cK BE, which is absolutely adore. to the google again! -
"cK Be fragrance makes a sensual, intimate statement with a scent so subtle, that special someone has to get very close to you to locate this tantalizing scent. cK Be is a unique tonic musk that's clean and fresh. It draws them in without being overpowering. cK Be fragrance takes a closer look at who we are within this ageless, raceless, genderless world. It dares us to take risks, make mistakes, be unpredictable. It invites us to close our eyes, to open our minds, and to dream."
but oh well. i have Truth. so now i smell like Man incarnate. smell my musk next time we meet.
my parents bought me Calvin Klein Truth EDT for xmas. so me being me, i went to read up on it online-
"TRUTH CALVIN KLEIN MEN is a new scent that is distinctive, aspirational and upscale. Truth Men is sexy and classic, inspired by masculinity in its purest form. The signature scent is drawn from nature and the warmth of skin. The structure of the fragrance is centred around a fresh core of canopy greens accented by basil and cardamom which radiate natural freshness throughout the fragrance."
and right enough, i don't quite like how it smells. then i remembered my friend uses cK BE, which is absolutely adore. to the google again! -
"cK Be fragrance makes a sensual, intimate statement with a scent so subtle, that special someone has to get very close to you to locate this tantalizing scent. cK Be is a unique tonic musk that's clean and fresh. It draws them in without being overpowering. cK Be fragrance takes a closer look at who we are within this ageless, raceless, genderless world. It dares us to take risks, make mistakes, be unpredictable. It invites us to close our eyes, to open our minds, and to dream."
but oh well. i have Truth. so now i smell like Man incarnate. smell my musk next time we meet.
2005-12-13
monkey suits and iron clad men
running up and down
kitchen sink to the nursery play pen
logic/hearts, rolling wheels
as long as i'm not under
it's all okay its all good
roll on sweet thunder
sweet angel back from heaven today
sweet angel breathes fire to hurt
its all routine its all okay
it doesn't hurt just douse me in dirt
tell me baby, how does it feel
(i know you like the roll of the limosine wheels)
as long as i'm not under
it's all okay its all good
roll on sweet thunder
running up and down
kitchen sink to the nursery play pen
logic/hearts, rolling wheels
as long as i'm not under
it's all okay its all good
roll on sweet thunder
sweet angel back from heaven today
sweet angel breathes fire to hurt
its all routine its all okay
it doesn't hurt just douse me in dirt
tell me baby, how does it feel
(i know you like the roll of the limosine wheels)
as long as i'm not under
it's all okay its all good
roll on sweet thunder
2005-12-06
2005-11-20
2005-10-21
2005-10-05
Cirque du Soleil: Where Men in Tights Actually Look Good.
Quidam was the name of the I watched tonight, which was staged in a yellow-and-blue striped tent pitched in the open field next to Bugis Junction. The taught tent had three peaks, almost from out of "Big Fish".
But what happened inside was a whole different story. The Circus has evolved. When I was a kid, the circus used to pitch near Parkway Parade in the east. It had stalls all over with games like ring-toss and cotton candy. This circus had no games, and even more curiously, no animals.
Americans might say "its the canadians". But whatever the reason, I loved it. The blurb on the official website states:
Quidam: a nameless passer-by, a solitary figure lingering on a street corner, a person rushing past. It could be anyone, anybody. Someone coming, going, living in our anonymous society. A member of the crowd, one of the silent majority. The one who cries out, sings and dreams within us all. This is the "quidam" that Cirque du Soleil is celebrating.
A young girl fumes; she has already seen everything there is to see, and her world has lost all meaning. Her anger shatters her little world, and she finds herself in the universe of Quidam. She is joined by a joyful companion as well as another character, more mysterious, who will attempt to seduce her with the marvelous, the unsettling, and the terrifying.
What really happened that night was that everything wonderful and whimsical and amazing were all rolled and compressed into our eyeballs, and my eyes now hurt. They had a man from out of da-vinci's drawings. You know that picture. The circle with the man in the middle. He rolled around on stage and much as I want to describe it more, I just can't. Its just "wow".
I thought i'd write a review or recollection of Quidam after I watched it but I can't. Even at the show itself I was unable to take in all that was happening on stage. its just one of those things you watch, and feel. And it felt great.
I leave for New York in a few days. 16, to be exact. If you didn't already know, well, now you know. And this isn't the last you'll hear of it from me. I am excited to the max max max. I can't wait. Everyone tells me about NY, how it smells, how it feels, the NY Vibe. Its a State of Mind. The New York State of Mind I want. NYSOM.
NYSOM NYSOM.
Aside from that, ORD is near. I could smell it a month back. Now, I can almost taste it. The sweet tangy taste of freedom. mMMmm MMmmmmmMm.... Delicious.
Quidam was the name of the I watched tonight, which was staged in a yellow-and-blue striped tent pitched in the open field next to Bugis Junction. The taught tent had three peaks, almost from out of "Big Fish".
But what happened inside was a whole different story. The Circus has evolved. When I was a kid, the circus used to pitch near Parkway Parade in the east. It had stalls all over with games like ring-toss and cotton candy. This circus had no games, and even more curiously, no animals.
Americans might say "its the canadians". But whatever the reason, I loved it. The blurb on the official website states:
Quidam: a nameless passer-by, a solitary figure lingering on a street corner, a person rushing past. It could be anyone, anybody. Someone coming, going, living in our anonymous society. A member of the crowd, one of the silent majority. The one who cries out, sings and dreams within us all. This is the "quidam" that Cirque du Soleil is celebrating.
A young girl fumes; she has already seen everything there is to see, and her world has lost all meaning. Her anger shatters her little world, and she finds herself in the universe of Quidam. She is joined by a joyful companion as well as another character, more mysterious, who will attempt to seduce her with the marvelous, the unsettling, and the terrifying.
What really happened that night was that everything wonderful and whimsical and amazing were all rolled and compressed into our eyeballs, and my eyes now hurt. They had a man from out of da-vinci's drawings. You know that picture. The circle with the man in the middle. He rolled around on stage and much as I want to describe it more, I just can't. Its just "wow".
I thought i'd write a review or recollection of Quidam after I watched it but I can't. Even at the show itself I was unable to take in all that was happening on stage. its just one of those things you watch, and feel. And it felt great.
I leave for New York in a few days. 16, to be exact. If you didn't already know, well, now you know. And this isn't the last you'll hear of it from me. I am excited to the max max max. I can't wait. Everyone tells me about NY, how it smells, how it feels, the NY Vibe. Its a State of Mind. The New York State of Mind I want. NYSOM.
NYSOM NYSOM.
Aside from that, ORD is near. I could smell it a month back. Now, I can almost taste it. The sweet tangy taste of freedom. mMMmm MMmmmmmMm.... Delicious.
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